last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
