Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
