So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
