what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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