On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
