Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
