But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
