Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
