She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
