I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
