we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize