from now on my penis is your penis
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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