Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my being single is dangerous.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
