check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i was born a porn star she said
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
