Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
