love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
