i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize