we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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