Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
