Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
