shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
