So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
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