This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
