Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
