You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
