I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
