STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
