I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Randomize
