How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
