I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
