Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
