At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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