I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
