And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
