so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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