She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
