I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
