idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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