It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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