people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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