We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
