weddingsv make me drug and hornr
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
