do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
