didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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