i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize