I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Randomize
