Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
