Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
