Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
