new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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